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This simply in: A well-known faculty professor has been arrested and accused of placing marijuana within the meals that seagulls devour. When requested why he did this he acknowledged - "I need to go away no tern unstoned" ...

A lawyer was driving his massive BMW down the freeway, singing to himself, "I like my BMW, I like my BMW." Specializing in his automobile, not his driving, he smashed right into a tree. He miraculously survived, however his automobile was totaled. "My BMW! My...